The High School Reunion

It’s time for a more detailed story from the fourth chapter of the life and times of Dear Margaret and Charming Spencer:

Stepping out of a steel cocoon into nothingness…six members of the Class of 1975 feel a sense of physical disassociation as they leave the elevator and walk directly into the window-walled 10th story ballroom of the Harnett Valley Holiday Inn. Margaret clings to Spencer’s arm, willing him to stay close by her side. Before entering the crowd of people, she turns to the woman next to her and asks, “Frannie, you were on the contact committee, weren’t you?  Is Morgan going to be here? Will he bring Lucinda?” Margaret begins to hyperventilate. Spencer intervenes and places a paper grocery sack from Piggly Wiggly over her head.

“Breathe slowly, dearest,” he says as he massages her good elbow with his knee. Margaret recovers and the bag is removed.

As her breathing continues, unabated, Frannie replies. “He’s stationed somewhere in Alaska, doubted he could make it but he left the reservation open… just in case he could get someone to sled-dog him out of there. Lucinda? She left him four years ago. She’s here, over there by the bar.” Pointing to a tall, slim, raven haired beauty dressed in a stunning black sheath, she continues, “she married Conrad Fitzhugh, you know… the Judge’s cousin from West Memphis? He was killed last October in a hunting accident in Texas. They said it was self-defense. She said it was murder, but no one listened.”

Frannie’s husband, Joe Mac, says, “Oh yes, ya’ll remember that, don’t cha? It was all over the news. Made CNN. Tragic. As he lay dying, he was gored by a rogue anteater and then mauled by a firefighter from Cleveland who mistook him for a flame. Sadly, his fire went out… permanently. Tragic case of misidentification. See ya… I need a good stiff one.”

Joe Mac heads across the ballroom, glancing from side to side. He is relieved to see the same crowd he sees every Saturday night at The Sawmill. Few of Joe Mac’s high school buddies ever left town. Maybe a few years of college but they returned to run the family hardware store or to join their mother’s law firm as junior partner. Those who graduated and moved on? They don’t return except for weddings and funerals… and the occasional high school reunion.

He joins his friends who are already at the bar, and orders a cherry slushee. The men slap each other on the back as they reminisce about the State Championship game and getting puking drunk on the bus ride back to town. Good old Coach Bobby, they don’t make them like that any more. Joe Mac suggests getting together to play touch football on Saturdays, but they all know it won’t happen.

Truth is, Joe Mac daydreams about porking the baby sitter, pulling over in Groveland  Park while taking her home. Making it with her in the back seat. Then he realizes the fourteen-year-old girl is Bobby’s little sister. It takes him a moment to convince himself it would be wrong.

The women’s conversation lags until Frannie begins to describe her recent yeast infection. Peals of laughter erupt from the group she does her “round brush” routine. Two men at the bar shift their line of vision to see who’s causing the laughter. One whispers  to the other, Joe Mac’s never been able to shut her up but she’s got fantastic tits. A nod of agreement. Yeah and she gave great blow jobs behind the bleachers during study hall. Both men sigh.

Margaret finishes her cup of herbal tea and looks around at the women. They are still laughing at Frannie’s joke. Spencer told her how nice everyone would be but she didn’t think they’d talk about their wee-wee’s like that. She tells herself to stay calm. She’ll ask Cook why anyone would use yeast for anything other than baking bread. The women change subjects and begin discussing Edmond’s recent secret marriage to Julie Smackover.

Frannie’s cousin, Lisa, works at the Pulaski County courthouse and files the marriage licenses. Lisa deemed the marriage information a top priority and, knowing it was Diaper Gymnastics day, called the office of the “Y” to tell Frannie. This marriage will affect everyone. Edmond is their pediatrician. His father? Dr. Stillitoe? He’s their OB-GYN.

The woman to Frannie’s left, Susie Gray, reveals what she’s heard. “Julie grew up in Piggot and graduated ten years later than us. Rumor has it she flunked ninth grade because she missed the last three months of school. The rest of the story, if it is to be believed, is that she went to her aunt’s in Little Rock to have a baby. But she’s not from here, and none of them know any one in Piggot, so they can’t be sure. Just keep hush hush about the marriage, ya’ll,” she warns, “Edmond’s grandmother doesn’t know about it.”
 
Not knowing everyone already knew about the marriage, Edmond and Julie think the announcement they made last night at the Reunion Dinner at Harnett Valley Country Club was the first anyone heard of their recent nuptuals. Even then, Edmond swore them to all to secrecy.  Margaret asked Spencer why anyone would try to hide marsupials. He had no answer.

Frannie taps Susie Gray’s arm and says, “let’s go to the bathroom.” Susie Gray knows this signal. She and Frannie have been inseparable since third grade. Their mothers were law partners, their fathers were best friends, and they grew up in the same neighborhood.

Once in the bathroom, they check under the stalls to make sure they’re alone.

Frannie grabs Susie Gray’s hand, and begins laughing. “God knows she is trash. I can’t believe he married her. And she’s stupid. That’s the really sad part. Not a brain cell anywhere.”

“Who? Margaret? She may be mentally unstable and that bad arm’s a little peculiar, as well as her listing to one side when she walks, but she’s a long way from white trash. Her grand-daddy was Emanuel Bigby, the inventor.”

“No, you dumb ass, not sweet little Margaret. I’m talking about that Julie woman. Listen… remember me telling you how Mama saw her in the Pig last winter? She recognized her from that Miss January photo on Wayne O’s Snap-On calendar down at the shop.  Mama said Julie was in the grocery store, wearing a mink coat and flip flops…and some kind of lime green stretch pants. Talking to the bag boy, you know, Artie’s little brother… they were whispering about something. Mama said their faces were less than three inches apart. Julie looked real mad. When Artie’s brother grabbed Julie’s shoulder, she smacked his hand. Then she hissed something like, Don’t call me anymore. Stay away from me you creep. It’s over. Remember Artie saying his brother went to live in Phoenix with his granddad? Maybe that’s why. I never thought much about it, I never thought she’d marry Edmond.”

Susie Gray smiles. “Oh, yeah. I remember. Watch the door… the baby-sitter gave me a joint. I got some matches from the bar. I’m going to want a cigarette, too. Do you have any change? There’s a machine in the lobby downstairs. Ahhhh…" she inhales deeply, holds the smoke, and while releasing it, says, "Here, have some."

"Thanks. Someone’s coming in, take it in a stall…”

The bathroom door opens and Margaret comes in. “Hey. Hi. It’s okay Susie Gray. It’s just Margaret.” She hops down from the toilet rim and opens the stall door wider. “Hey, there. The baby-sitter gave Susie Gray a joint. Want some?”

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next up — the reunion golf  tournament